Day 316
I have come to realize what I do when I need comfort.
And before I disclose what that actually is … I’ll tell you what I do NOT do. I do not clean my house. I do not go out for a jog, run or walk. I don’t pour myself a drink or take a bath – or do both at the same time.
What I do is light a lot of candles … and in A LOT, I mean the smoke detector could easily go off … I watch tv non-stop and I eat.
This weekend I think the TV was on for the majority of each day/night and programmed to any sappy holiday movie (which I had plenty to choose from but most were pretty lame) or the Food Network for a change of pace.
My eyes are bleary. I’ve practically run out of candles. And I’m feeling really disgusting from my dietary intake.
Which basically was non-stop (like the TV) … and comprised of a half gallon of espresso chip ice cream and nearly a pound of bacon.
Yes, I admit it. I’m a baconator. I’m a hog. I’m a pig for pork.
And, for the moment, let’s just pretend I didn’t say anything about eating a mountain of espresso chip ice cream … and we’ll really pretend I didn’t mention that the frozen dairy bliss included whipped cream and toffee bits.
Bacon. Okay vegetarians and vegans, I’m sorry. I’m sorry you find this repulsive. Close this out and read no further. I can’t help myself. I am a T-Rex at heart. I’m sure if there were mammals when the dinosaurs roamed the planet some dinosaur would have invented fire so that he could roast a pig and have BACON.
I had bacon on an English muffin today. Forget that I’m not supposed to have gluten, as apparently, TOO BAD was my motto for the weekend. And not only did I have an English muffin – but I put cream cheese on it, too. Close your ears as I’m not supposed to have dairy either. (Hence I am not mentioning again the ice cream or whipped cream!)
I had bacon on my salad (oh, yes … I had a salad! REDEMPTION!) … but I’m pretty sure there was a larger ratio of bacon to lettuce in my bowl.
Then, later, I actually had 3 slices of bacon … AS A SNACK!
What the hell got into me today?
I actually was watching Food Network and their mystery ingredient for the show was … of course … BACON. So, it was just fitting that I should be eating some while watching them cook with it. Right? They even made bacon wrapped bacon. Hmmm – as much as I love the stuff … that concept was a bit lost on me!
But seriously … bacon, soft lighting, sappy holiday movies and ice cream did the trick. I felt so much better (well, emotionally) after my gluttony and sloth-like demeanor all weekend.
In any case, if I survive the night without having a heart attack or gastrointestinal bloat or a colon-eruption … I’ll be very happy!
And, just fyi … after the gorging pork-fest of this weekend I can honestly say I’d still like to eat more bacon in the morning. Too bad I ate it all! But, I do believe there is still some ice cream …