On the Road – Again … Part II

Day 35

Oh … road trips. Here I am … in Winchester, KY trying to find that (still elusive) new hometown. I am NOT having a successful time of finding a new place to live. It shouldn’t be this hard! I’m not asking too much … just a quaint town that isn’t half boarded up, that doesn’t have items from when I went to prom (1975) in their display windows and a grocery store that I don’t have to drive 45 minutes to. And when I get there it would be nice if it were better than a Speedy Mart.

But nevertheless, road trips are good and I’ll find my town. And I have seen some really pretty, rolling hill countryside and  I do like driving and the gypsiesqueness (good new word!) of road trips. Ah – the open road! Miles of uncharted territory (well, not so uncharted as I have maps) … wide open vistas (sometimes) … wildlife (mostly cows – so not so wild) in abundance … and a blaring radio (most of the time).

Which brings me to more “on the road” findings:

1. The frequency of which you hear a song rises exponentially with how much you hate it. You love a song – you never hear it. You hate a song – and that is the one that they play over and over and OVER again. I can now sing the theme song from Grease better than John Travolta or Olivia Newton-John.

2. If I ever have the chance to meet John Tesh someone better hold me back because after these last few days of listening to his drivel I am ready to kick his ass.

3. Radio people must have a cush-job. I’ve been driving all over this state and have heard the same songs, in the same order, for 3 days now. Egad people! Mix it up! Change the tape!

4. When stopping in at a fast food restaurant – trying to find something that has some semblance of nutrition to it and not so much salt as to have Bambi start licking you … you notice that whomever is in front of you ordering the supersize fries and soft drink REALLY should not be doing so.

5. Time disappears. It’s 1:17 and the next time you look at the clock it’s 5:40 and you still have a zillion miles to go and you are sure the highway has turned into a large treadmill because you seem to be going nowhere.

6. The exit you get off at is the wrong exit for your hotel. It does however have a nice selection of restaurants and services.

7. The exit which actually has your hotel has NO restaurants or services so you have 2 choices: go back to the exit you got off at originally … some 4-10 miles away or hope you can coast to the nearest gas station the next day and then you clean out your purse and eat whatever is in the bottom of it. Dinner last night was potato chips from the vending machine and a handful of linty raisins from the coin section of my wallet.

8. By Day 3 it is quite apparent that John Tesh owns all the radio stations. How does Connie stand him? He’d better watch out and have good body guards! All I’m sayin’.

9. No matter how much you wanted this trip … there’s no place like home!

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