Gator Girl …

Day 31

I have a confession. I have an infatuation with alligators. Well, not just alligators but crocodiles and well, pretty much anything that is gator-ish I like!

You might ask – what’s the difference between gators and crocs (the animals not the rubbery shoes)?

Gators made their first appearance during the Oligocene epoch – some 37 million years ago! I guess that’s why they are sometimes called the LIVING DINOSAURS!

There are two kinds of alligators these days: the American alligator found in the SE United States (up to 18 ft long and 800 lbs.)  and the Chinese alligator found in China (usually not more than 7 ft and weighing significantly less than its cousin).

Each have large lizard-like bodies, strong tails, are nearly black in color and have ~ 75 teeth hidden in the jaw in a U-shaped snout.

In any case I’d rather not be too close to either of them! Other species are known from fossils but are now extinct.

Crocodiles are also large aquatic reptiles but appeared on the scene during the Eocene epoch, about 55 million years ago. They are more widely found around the world and range from 3′-16′ in length and can weigh more than 2600 lbs. though most weigh in at under 500 lbs.!

Crocs are more of an olive to khaki color with black markings and have a V-shaped snout with prominently displayed overlapping teeth.

Both alligator and crocodile gender is not determined by sex chromosomes but by the temperature of their incubation, have a life span of up to 80 years and have been or are on the endangered or threatened species list.

And while they are scary and kind of creepy looking – in an awesome, primordial kind of way, I still think they are remarkably alluring. And I’m pretty sure my being drawn to these creatures all stems from watching too many cartoons in my youth.

Yes – blame it all on Hanna-Barbera and their cartoons back in the ’60’s! Good ol’ Wally Gator … what a guy! He was one of my favorites … along with Yogi Bear and Hurricane Hippo, Quick Draw McGraw and Magilla Gorilla. Ah, those were the days!

In any case – I loved Wally and think my love affair for all things gatoresque started around that time and I think it coincided with a gift my brother received from my Dad while he was on a business trip in Florida. He sent my brother a box of chameleons! Let’s just say that the pencil hole punctures in the shoe box allowed for sufficient airflow but somewhere between his mailing the package and us receiving it – all the little ones inside perished – leaving us to open a box of brown mummified lizards! Gee, thanks Dad! In any case, I was fascinated (such a morbid child!) … but these little dessicated creatures were just too dinosaur-like and too creepy-cool to be ignored. The love affair flourished!

Along the way I’ve collected pictures and cards, trinkets and bracelets with a “cute” gator guy on it. When my kids were little we read picture books of gators. I have a puppet I use in tutoring. What can I say? I like them!

I have several friends who “winter” in Florida (Peggy has named her place “The Gator House”!) and they all have had gator sightings … some a little too close for comfort (a gator sunning in the middle of the golf cart path, one on the back patio, another in the driveway)! And a new story, as of this morning, about Joe and Dave (aka: Idiot and Super Idiot). They saw a “gynormous” gator sunning on the course and got out to take a picture with it! They are alive to tell the tale but neither will ever wear their pants again … shredded by an alligator swipe and well … I’ll leave the rest to your imagination. Super Idiot claims he thought it was a fake gator. Yeah … a 12′ rubber gator on the golf course … in Florida … by water. Smart guy.

Now, while I think gators and their kin are very cool – I respect them too much to mess with them and do not necessarily want one in my yard or eyeing my golf clubs. I’d much prefer to carry one … as say a handbag. (Only half kidding all you PETA people!)

Several years ago my daughter and I were in Orlando  before we were to zip off on a cruise. It was like Disneyland and Christmas all wrapped up in one. Okay, well, it WAS Disneyland cuz we were near the Magic Kingdom but what to my wondering eyes should appear … but a miniature golf course … with the best flashing neon sign announcing they had … ALLIGATORS!  (Wrestling and babies to hold!) With hearts aflutter we were off before we could say – Blue Cross Blue Shield. (Are gator bites covered?!)

That night we played miniature golf (poorly at best as I was too excited about the gator part of the evening yet to come) … and then we watched in awe and disbelief (and kind of a general consensus that the guy doing the wrestling had one too many screws loose) the gator wrestling. The gators lost every time. Thankfully.

And then, in all his splendor there was Albert. He was a four year old gator, 40 lbs and 4 feet long. Not as big as you’d imagine (about a cantaloupe width’s around his belly) but he was hefty. And soft. Oh, was he soft! We covered his little ear slits and said what a beautiful belt or shoes or purse he’d make. (Again, to PETA people, my apologies … we were KIDDING.) Kind of. Anyway – Sam and I got our pictures holding him – our own gator wrestling! (He had his mouth banded … no need to worry about fingers snapped off or insurance coverage!)

And if I’m getting your gator juices flowing … there are plenty of gator farms around the country. If in CO you needn’t travel too far to get a gator fix … check out Colorado Gators Reptile Park: www.gatorfarm.com! Might be worth a summer field trip!

Or if  you’d like to see gators from the comfort of your own couch … you might want to watch Lake Placid I , II or III.  These are enormously awful mutant-alligator thriller movies but Betty White is in the first one (which isn’t so awful)! So there is something redeeming about it!

And while I am still enamoured by these prehistoric beasts and think they’re cool – I don’t want one as a pet (anymore). However,  I wouldn’t mind seeing one crossing the road once in a while … as long as I knew it couldn’t get me or if it was willing to sacrifice itself for let’s say … a pair of nice shoes!

Later gator!

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