Day 29
Okay … joke’s on ME! No sooner had I pushed the “publish” button on yesterday’s post than I looked outside and what did I see?
Yes … MR. T!
Right across the street … standing sideways so I could see his elongated feathery body … perfectly framed by the pane of glass in my office window … standing there, in the park, looking directly at the house … at ME … as he may well have done a hundred times before.
Somehow I felt taunted. Like he was thumbing his turkey nose at me (no turkeys do not have thumbs – but if he had one he would have been using it) saying, “Here I am you poor pathetic creature of this neighborhood – the last human in this entire area that has not seen me yet. Here ya go – look out your window. I’ve been here all along!”
And so I had a good, long look at him – through the binoculars I keep on my desk (for just such an occasion) – and there he was … in all his wild turkey splendor … just as I thought. Thrilling!
And in finally seeing him I realized something while looking at the no-longer-elusive Mr. T … turkeys are damn ugly! Egad. Bad, bad, BAD!
I believe in reincarnation … kind of a nice thought to get another go of things here on Planet Earth in another shape and form. However, on certain days I am pretty sure that if there is such a thing I will be unlucky enough to come back as a vulture or an elephant seal or a Moray eel or any number of poor, unfortunate-in-looks creature. Well, add turkey to the list. Not good. If there is a prayer for reincarnation – let it be known I do not want to return as a turkey!
And, who knows, maybe Mr. T is just a very unattractive turkey in the turkey kingdom? Maybe he’s like Poindexter from the Barbie game and just really unfortunate and was not in line the day they handed out the “good looks” cards? Maybe that is why he is all by himself – no other turkey friends nearby – and hanging out with all the geese? Maybe he is lost or an outcast from his group? His rafter. While geese travel in gaggles … a group of turkeys is called a rafter. So maybe he is rafter-less … trying his luck with the geese-babes … looking for some new friends while nibbling on the long-dead grasses over at the park.
Hmm, rafters. I didn’t know that before just now. And in saying what kinds of groups these creatures are associated with it reminds me of a game I’d play with the kids when they were little. I drove around a lot – delivering cosmetics (Ted could sound out the ingredients on the boxes by the time he was 4! I should have known the brain capacity then!) – anyway, while driving we’d play a “who belongs to what group” type of game … I’d throw out a multiple choice question and they’d guess … so we learned our “animal groups” … herds of cows, gaggles of geese, schools of fish, pods of whales, flocks of birds, bands of gorillas, prides of lions, knots of toads, coveys of quail and so on … but never once did we ever question what a group of turkeys was called. Hmm.
In any case, now we all know. And for whatever reason Mr. T. is going solo these days and away from his rafter – I’m grateful he finally showed himself to me … turkey nose-thumbing aside … and I’m glad I didn’t have to be out in the park, in my bathrobe, in order to finally see him.